Dec 29 2010 Airdrie & Coatbridge
GOD loves a trier.
Well, if he does, he loves Spud, Coatbridge’s answer tae Paul Daniels.
The Bank Street Hacks were out in the town for their Christmas bash. After the turkey and trimmings in Ata it was off tae Cul de Sac in St John’s Street for one or two shandies.
The bold Spud, a friendly tattooed fella wi’ a pack of cards, introduced himself and asked if we wanted tae see a trick. Aye, fire away, pal, he was telt.
Spud then proceeded tae shuffle the cards and get a few folk tae cut them before splitting them up intae different piles.
It seems they were aw meant tae be the same colour when they were turned over.
Shughie’s sorry tae tell ye it didnae work. It didnae stoap Spud fae trying tae get it right.
In fact he tried a good few times but it still didnae work.
Spud, if yer reading this, don’t be too disheartened, pal.
Ye gave it a good go.
TALKIN’ of giving it a good go, Shughie had high hopes for The Stables boys last week.
He had his fingers crossed for the Plains team delivering an early Christmas present wi’ their first win of the season in the darts league.
They were playing The C Team, who play out of Airdrie Working Men’s Club and who have a similar record as The Stables. Precisely nae wins this season going intae the match.
But the C Team took no time at all in inflicting a 10-2 defeat on The Stables tae end a miserable year for the Plains side.
New year, new beginning boys, Shughie says.
So get yer heids up and get right intae them in 2011.
TWO fellas were standing at Airdrie Cross.
It was bitter cauld and the streets were awfy icey. Especially the pedestrian area outside Henderson the jewellers.
A wee wifey was clearly struggling wi’ her message bags as she walked past. The two men were swapping stories as they stood watchin’ the wee wummin and others doing their best tae cope wi’ the treacherous surface.
Then one says tae the other, if we staun here long enough we’ll see somebody fall on their a**e.
You probably would have boys, but ye didnae have to make it sound as if ye were looking forward tae it, says Shughie.
A COUPLE were pushing a big shopping trolley bulging wi’ messages across Graham Street fae Morrisons.
Shughie couldnae take his eyes aff them. They had a wean sitting on the wee seat as they ploughed through the frozen snow piled up at the side of the road.
The wifey had a lit fag between her lips, the smoke narrowing her eyes as she steered the front end while her man, lit fag between the fingers, provided the muscle.
Their wee boy was oblivious as the determinedly made their way tae the bus stop outside the church.
Shughie felt like giving them a round of applause when they got there.
He’s no’ sure if they tried tae get the trolley on the bus, but he widnae have been surprised.
THE BANK Street Hacks, as ye’ll know fae last week’s paper, cannae agree what tae call toasted cheese.
This week Shughie can reveal that they don’t know their Boxers fae their St Bernards either.
By common agreement in the office the two dugs dressed up in our photie were called St Bernards. Turns out, they’re no’. Thanks tae the fella who phoned for settin’ us straight, by the way. Shughie could tell they were Boxers because they would have had wee barrels of brandy hanging round their necks if they were St Bernard’s
But naebody would listen.
Well, it’s the last words of 2010 fae Shughie so he would like tae wish ye aw a great New Year.
Look after yerselves and each other whatever ye get up tae.