Oct 27 2010 Airdrie & Coatbridge
A WEEK hardly goes by without some hauf wit causing trouble at Monklands Hospital.
Somebody who cannae handle their drink, shouting and swearing at the doctors, nurses or polis.
Can ye imagine how distressing it must be if ye are in the A&E with something concerning ye and there’s a drunken fool shouting the odds at some poor lassie who’s just tryin’ tae help?
The Bank Street Hacks see them at court every week, getting a rap oan the knuckles for causing grief tae folk who are just tryin’ tae dae their best for others.
Shughie gets fair scunnered when he hears the various tales of woe.
Always wi’ bevvy as an excuse, of course.
“He has no recollection of the events, your Lordship,” some apologetic lawyer tells the court as if that’s OK.
Of course he disnae! Cause he was blootered and he’s a clown.
But I tell you who does remember it.
The nurses and doctors on another busy night no’ being able tae treat folk who need their help.
No’ tae mention the people waiting tae be seen.
It does Shughie’s heid in that kind of thing.
SHUGHIE said it widnae happen.
He telt his wife - am no’ watchin’ the X-Factor so stoap tryin’ tae tell me who ye want to win. Am no’ interested.
That was a couple of weeks ago.
Noo the Man Wi the Bunnet’s right intae it.
He cannae be doin’ wi’ the judges, it has to be said, and disnae like the rubbish singers who sometimes appear.
But the ones who can hold a tune are smashin’.
Aye, Shughie’s hooked.
BACK in the day, of course, we didnae have the X Factor.
It was Hughie Green and Opportunity Knocks.
Some young boy playin’ the spoons wi’ his da on the drums.
The clapometer would be goin’ through the roof as the audience, sitting there in their beige slacks and Simon shirts, showed their appreciation.
Aye, those were the days – and I mean that most sincerely folks.
STILL with quality crooners.
How about the following beautiful couplet from one of Scotland’s most renowned artistes?
“Tiny Bubbles in the wine,
Make me feel happy, make me feel fine.”
So sang Sidney Devine who Shughie has a wee soft spot for. Now, Shughie’s no sayin’ Sidney is really that good. But sometimes ye like something even if ye shouldnae.
However, the Man Wi the Bunnet’s no’ for slagging off Steak and Kidney. That’s like shootin’s fish in a barrel and Shughie’s no’ havin’ that.
SHUGHIE says aw the best tae the good folk in Burnbank Street in Sunnyside who want tae stop a noisy recylcing plant opening up across the road.
One of the boys in the office went up tae hear what they had to say. All the ones he spoke to had been living up there for years and some for decades.
And that makes ye think about our towns. Full of folk who build their lives here, tryin’ tae get on and make the most for their families.
Communities are important, says Shughie, and they are at their best when folk stick together. Good luck tae the Burnbank Street folk with their campaign.
WELL done the Airdrie United boys who currently top the fitba’ supporters quiz league.
Featuring the Advertiser’s own Colin Paterson, along with Keith Love, Tom Fletcher and John Henderson, they turned in a blinder at Dow’s Bar in Glasgow in the latest round.
But Shughie hears that when the Hamilton Accies lads hosted a night they had a whole round on their team. Eh? Is that no’ a bit oot o’ order says the Man Wi’ the Bunnet.
Well it is, but the Airdrie boys kept their cool under extreme provocation, like true champions, to maintain their domination.
Shughie likes a wee quiz night and says there’s got to be a level playing field.
No question about that.